Daniel - Gen Z Bible

Daniel 1

Yo, in the third year of Jehoiakim’s reign over Judah, Nebuchadnezzar, the king of Babylon, straight-up pulled into Jerusalem and set up camp around it.
So, like, God allowed Jehoiakim, who was king of Judah, to get captured. And not just that, but Nebuchadnezzar also took some sacred stuff from God’s house and hauled it off to Shinar to stash in his own god’s crib. Yeah, he basically stockpiled those treasures there.
Then the king ordered Ashpenaz, the chief of his officials, to pick out some Israelite teens and some from the royal family and top officials.
These teens were top-tier: good-looking, brainy, and skilled in every subject. They were total whizzes, mastering everything from science to languages. They were the perfect crew to serve in the king’s court, learning all about the Chaldeans.
The king set them up with his best grub and drinks every day for three years, making sure they were well-fed and ready to impress him later on.
So, in this squad, there were four dudes from Judah named Daniel, Hananiah, Mishael, and Azariah:
Then the head dude in charge of them gave them new names: Daniel got called Belteshazzar, Hananiah was named Shadrach, Mishael became Meshach, and Azariah got tagged as Abednego.
But Daniel was like, “Nah, I’m not gonna mess with that fancy food and wine from the king.” So, he asked the eunuch in charge if he could skip it and stay true to himself.
So, like, God totally made Daniel mad popular and tight with the chief eunuch. Fr!
Yo, the chief said to Daniel, “I’m low-key scared of the king, man. He’s the one who decides what you eat and drink. If he sees you looking all sad while the other kids your age are pumped up, I’m gonna catch major heat. Can’t let that go down, bro.”
So Daniel talked to Melzar, the dude in charge appointed by the chief eunuch, who was looking after Daniel, Hananiah, Mishael, and Azariah, yo!
Yo, listen up, boss. How about we try something? Give us just ten days, and serve us some veggies and water. You down?
Yo, compare how we look with the dudes chowing down on the king’s grub. Do what you gotta do, fam.
So he was like, “Yeah, cool, let’s do it,” and decided to test them for ten days.
After ten days, they were looking way fresher and totally had a glow-up compared to all the other kids eating the king’s fancy food.
So Melzar ditched their main dishes and fancy drinks, and hooked them up with simple plant-based grub instead.
Yo, these four homies? God blessed them with crazy knowledge and skills in all sorts of learning and wisdom. And listen up, Daniel was next level—he could interpret all those wild visions and dreams, man.
So, when the time came and the king called for them, the chill chief eunuch brought them before Nebuchadnezzar.
So, the king had a convo with them all, and out of everyone, he couldn’t find anyone as dope as Daniel, Hananiah, Mishael, and Azariah. That’s why they totally got a VIP spot in front of the king.
And, like, in every way of being super smart and all, when the king consulted them, he found out they were, like, ten times sharper than all the magicians and fortune-tellers in the whole kingdom. It was their epic wisdom and deep understanding, you know!
And Daniel stayed in service until the start of King Cyrus’ reign.

Daniel 2

So, like, back in the day when Nebuchadnezzar was totally in charge, he had these wild dreams that seriously messed with his mind. His spirit was all troubled, and he couldn’t even catch some Z’s.
So the king was like, ‘Hey, summon all the magicians, astrologers, sorcerers, and Chaldeans right now to decode my dreams.’ And they showed up, standing before the king like bosses.
So the king was like, ‘Hey, listen up. I had this insane dream and it’s freaking me out. I gotta know what it means.’
The Chaldeans were like, ‘Hey, what’s up, king? Live long, man! Tell us the dream and we’ll break it down for you.’
The king was like, ‘Yo, Chaldeans, I totally blanked on what I dreamed. If you don’t spill the tea and tell me what it means, I’ll make sure you’re done for and your places are wrecked. #harsh
Hey, yo, pay attention! If you spill the beans on that dream and break down what it means, I’ll hook you up with some dope gifts, rewards, and major respect. So spill it, spill the tea on the dream and its interpretation. You won’t regret it, fam. Trust!
They were like, ‘Bro, just spill the tea and tell us your dream, and we’ll totally interpret it for you.’
The king was like, ‘I see what’s up, you’re just stalling ’cause you know everything’s slipping away from me.’
Listen up, if you don’t spill the beans on the dream, there’s only one outcome for you all. You’ve come here with false and messed up words, trying to play me until things change. So spill the dream already, and then I’ll know if you can actually explain what it means.
The Chaldeans were like, ‘Hey, king, there’s no one on this earth who can handle your case. No king, lord, or ruler has ever asked the magicians, astrologers, or Chaldeans something like this.’
It’s really rare for the king to ask for something like this, and no one else can do it except the gods, who don’t chill with regular folks.
Because of this, the king got really upset and was super angry, so he ordered to wipe out all the wise guys in Babylon.
So basically, they made a decree that said all the wise guys had to die. And you know what? Daniel and his crew were on that hit list too.
So Daniel came up with a really clever and wise answer for Arioch, the captain of the king’s guard, who was on a mission to execute all the wise people in Babylon.
Yo, Daniel asked Arioch, the head honcho of the king’s crew, why the king’s orders are coming in so suddenly? And Arioch spilled the details to Daniel.
So Daniel slid into the king’s DMs and asked for a moment to come up with a dope explanation for the king.
So Daniel gathered with his crew Hananiah, Mishael, and Azariah at his place and spilled the tea to his squad:
You know how Daniel and his squad were about to get in deep trouble with all the other wise guys in Babylon? Well, they prayed to the God of heaven to show them some mercy and protect them from that fate. And guess what? It totally worked, all thanks to the Big Man upstairs!
Yo, so Daniel had this amazing moment where he received a crazy night vision and got all the details on a secret. And you know what? Daniel straight up praised the God of heaven after that!
Daniel was like, “Let’s give it up for God’s name forever and ever, yo! ‘Cause he’s got all the wisdom and power, for real.”
And like, God totally has the power to change up the times and the situations. He can totally remove rulers and appoint new ones. He’s all about blessing the wise with wisdom and giving knowledge to those who seek it, you feel?
He reveals all the hidden and secret things; he knows what’s going down in the shadows, and he’s all about that positive energy.
Yo, big shoutout and thanks to you, God of my crew, for hookin’ me up with wisdom and strength. You came through and gave us the scoop on what we were askin’ for. You straight-up let us in on the king’s business!
So Daniel approached Arioch, whom the king had put in charge of eliminating the wise folks in Babylon. He went up to him and said, “Hey, please don’t off the wise ones in Babylon! Bring me before the king, and I’ll break down the interpretation.”
So, Arioch was in a rush and brought Daniel to the king, and he was like, ‘Yo, I found this dude from Judah who can totally explain your dream and spill the tea on it, you feel me?’
The king was like, ‘Daniel, aka Belteshazzar, can you really spill the tea on my dream and tell me what it means?’
Daniel was like, ‘Straight up, none of those so-called wise guys – the astrologers, magicians, and fortune tellers – can spill the secret that the king wants to know.’
But listen up, there’s a Supreme Being up in the heavens who’s all about unveiling secrets and letting King Nebuchadnezzar know what’s gonna go down in the future. So here’s the deal, that dream you had and those deep visions in your head while you were chilling on your bed? Yeah, they’re all connected. God’s been straight-up revealing it all, you know?
Yo, king, while you were chilling on your bed, you were pondering what’s gonna happen in the future. And guess what? The one who reveals secrets is gonna clue you in on what’s up ahead.
But listen up, just so you know, this secret I have? It’s not because I’m some genius or better than anyone else. It’s actually meant for those who can interpret it for the king, you know what I’m saying? And also so you can grasp what’s really going on deep down in your heart, for real.
Yo, king, you had this amazing vision. It was all about this awesome image, shining like crazy, right in front of you. But yo, this image was seriously intimidating.
This statue had a head made of top-tier gold, its chest and arms were super shiny silver, and its stomach and legs were all about that brass life, you know? Like, the thighs were so lit, or you could call them sides if that’s your vibe.
Yo, this dude had legs of pure iron and his feet were like a mix of iron and clay.
So, you were tuned in, right? And you peeped this stone that was, like, magically formed without being made by human hands. And dude, this stone totally wrecked the statue’s feet, which were made of iron and clay, and shattered them into a million pieces. It was epic! (No cap, that stone was definitely not something you’d find in anybody’s hands.)
So, like, the iron, clay, brass, silver, and gold all got completely wrecked and turned into worthless dust, just like the chaff from summer threshing floors. The wind blew them away, and there wasn’t a trace of them left. But then this stone came out of nowhere and smashed the whole image, becoming this massive mountain that covered the entire earth. Crazy, right?
So, here’s what’s up: this is the dream we received, and we’re about to break it down and explain it to the king.
Yo, king, you’re like the top king of all kings because the Most High up in heaven blessed you with an amazing kingdom, incredible power, strength, and glorious majesty.
Like, wherever people dwell, you’ve been given dominion over all the animals on land and birds in the sky. You’re the ultimate ruler over all of them. And dude, you’re the head honcho, seriously!
And after your kingdom, there’s gonna be another one, not as strong as yours, and then a third kingdom made of brass that’s gonna dominate the whole earth.
And the fourth kingdom is gonna be really powerful, you know? It’s gonna be like iron, ’cause iron can totally break stuff and conquer everything. Just like iron breaks things, this kingdom is gonna break things too and dominate everything.
So, you saw those feet and toes, right? Some were made of clay from the pottery peeps and others were made of iron. Well, here’s the tea: the kingdom’s gonna be divided, but it’ll still have some serious strength because of that iron mixed with the clay.
And those toes, some iron and some clay, right? That’s how the kingdom will be – kinda strong but kinda fragile, you know? Like, part strong and part brittle.
And, like, remember when you saw that iron mixed with clay? Well, those two things are gonna try to come together and mix with humans. But, like, they won’t fully stick together, you know? It’s kinda like how iron and clay don’t really blend well. So, yeah.
And during the time these kings are ruling, the God of heaven will set up a kingdom that will never be destroyed. This kingdom won’t be handed over to others, but it will crush and overcome all these kingdoms, and it will last forever.
So, like, you saw how that stone was cut from the mountain without any human hands and totally crushed the iron, brass, clay, silver, and gold. Bro, the mighty God has straight up shown the king what’s gonna go down in the future, and believe me, the dream is totally legit and the interpretation is solid.
So, like, King Nebuchadnezzar totally bowed down before Daniel and honored him, and then he was all like, “Yo, everyone needs to make offerings and burn some nice-smelling stuff for him.”
The king responded to Daniel and was like, “Dude, seriously, your God is the ultimate God, way above all other gods. He’s the boss of all kings and can totally uncover hidden things. You really showed your skills by revealing this secret.”
So, like, the king totally boosted Daniel’s status and showered him with awesome gifts. He even promoted him to be the ruler of the whole Babylon province and the head of all the wise folks in Babylon.
So Daniel requested of the king, and he appointed Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego to oversee the province of Babylon. But Daniel himself remained at the king’s court.

Daniel 3

King Nebuchadnezzar was flexing hard, yo. He put up this huge gold statue, like sixty cubits tall and six cubits wide, out in the field at Dura, in Babylon.
So Nebuchadnezzar was like, “Yo, let’s gather all the VIPs – princes, governors, captains, judges, treasurers, counselors, sheriffs, and all the big shots from the provinces – for this big event where we dedicate this statue I just put up.”
So, like, all the VIPs – princes, governors, captains, judges, treasurers, advisors, sheriffs, and all the rulers of the provinces – gathered for this massive event, the dedication of the colossal image King Nebuchadnezzar had erected. They were totally in awe standing before the mighty image Nebuchadnezzar had set up.
Then this dude, loud as heck, shouts out, like seriously loud, “Yo, listen up, all you peeps from every corner of the world, I’m talking to you, all you different cultures and languages, so check this out, the big shots are saying…”
When you hear those sick beats of the cornet, flute, harp, sackbut, psaltery, and dulcimer blasting in your ears, you gotta drop everything and show respect to the golden statue King Nebuchadnezzar set up. (By the way, dulcimer is like singing or a funky symphony in Chaldee)
And if anyone doesn’t bow down and worship, they’ll get tossed into a blazing hot furnace right then and there.
So, when everyone heard those sick beats of the cornet, flute, harp, sackbut, psaltery, and other awesome music, people from all different nations and languages straight up fell down and worshipped the golden statue that King Nebuchadnezzar had set up, no lie.
So, back in the day, these Chaldeans showed up and started dissing the Jews.
They approached King Nebuchadnezzar, saying, “Yo, King Nebuchadnezzar, may you live forever!”
“Hey king, you made a decree that when anyone hears the cornet, flute, harp, sackbut, psaltery, dulcimer, or any kind of music, they gotta bow down and worship the golden image. (BTW, dulcimer could also mean singing or a funky symphony in Chaldee)
“And if anyone refuses to bow down and worship, they’re gonna be thrown into, like, this insanely hot fiery furnace.”
Yo, there are these Jewish dudes you put in charge of Babylon, named Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego. They straight up ain’t bowing down to your gods or that golden statue you set up, King.
So, Nebuchadnezzar was seriously ticked off, right? He’s like, “Yo, bring me Shad, Mesh, and Abed!” And just like that, they brought those dudes straight to the king’s place.
Nebuchadnezzar goes, “Yo, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, is it true you won’t bow down to my gods or worship the massive golden statue I made? Like, seriously?”
“If you’re vibing to the sick beats of the cornet, flute, harp, sackbut, psaltery, dulcimer, and all kinds of lit music, and you bow down to worship the image I made, then we’re good. But if you don’t, just so you know, you’re getting tossed into a blazing furnace right away. And let me ask you, who do you think can rescue you from my power? (FYI, dulcimer can also mean singing or a symphony in Chaldee)
“Yo, Nebuchadnezzar, listen up! Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego ain’t sweating how to answer you about this.”
“If that’s how it’s gonna be, our God, who we’re all about, can totally save us from getting toasted in that fiery furnace. And He’ll definitely rescue us from your grip, O king.
“Hey, listen up, King. Just so you know, we ain’t bowing down to your gods or worshipping that flashy golden statue you set up.
Nebuchadnezzar flew into a rage and his face turned red hot with anger at Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego. So, he told his crew to crank up the heat in the furnace seven times hotter than usual.
And he told his toughest dudes to tie up Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego and toss them into the fiery furnace. (Those dudes were seriously strong, by the way.)
So these guys were tied up in their stylish clothes, their cool kicks, their fresh caps, and their other awesome threads, and they got thrown into the blazing hot furnace. (FYI: ‘coats’ could also mean ‘mantles’ and ‘hats’ could mean ‘turbans’).
So, because the king was really insistent and the furnace was insanely hot, the fire completely burned up those dudes who tried to mess with Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego.
So, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, these three dudes, got tossed into this insanely hot furnace, all tied up and everything.
OMG, Nebuchadnezzar, the king, was totally shook! He jumped up and was like, “Yo, didn’t we throw those three dudes into the fire all tied up?” His advisors were like, “Totally, King! That’s right!”
Yo, listen to this crazy story. I was watching this intense scene, and I saw these four guys just chilling, not even breaking a sweat, walking around in the middle of a blazing fire. And get this, they weren’t even getting burned! But here’s the wildest part – the fourth guy, he looked like the Son of God, straight up. Can you believe that?!
So Nebuchadnezzar walked up to the entrance of the blazing furnace and shouted, “Hey, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, you servants of the Almighty God, come out here, like, right now!” And Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego casually walked out of the fire, no big deal.
So, all the big shots – the princes, governors, captains, and the king’s advisors – they all gathered and witnessed something seriously mind-blowing. These guys, who were thrown into this intense fire, were completely unharmed! Not a single hair on their heads was singed, their clothes were still fresh, and they didn’t even smell like smoke. It was insane, dude!
So Nebuchadnezzar stepped forward and said, “Yo, big shoutout to the God of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego! Mad respect to Him for sending His angel and saving His loyal servants. These dudes straight up defied my orders and risked everything to stay true to their God and not bow down to any other god.”
“Listen up, everyone! I’m making a decree that if anyone, from any corner of the world, talks trash or disrespects the God of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, they’re gonna face serious consequences! Their lives will be wrecked and their homes turned to ruins! Let me tell you, there’s no other God who can rescue like this one can. Believe it or not, it’s official!”
So the king totally acknowledged Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego for being incredible and promoted them big time in Babylon. It was their moment to shine and prove how they could thrive in the kingdom. #Winning

Daniel 4

Yo, it’s your boy King Nebuchadnezzar sending love to all my homies across the globe. Big shoutout to everyone holding it down in every corner of the earth. I’m sending major love and praying for peace to be multiplied in your lives.
Check it, I gotta drop some truth about the sick miracles and crazy things the Almighty God has pulled off for me. Seriously, it’s mind-blowing stuff, you feel me?
His signs are off the charts mind-blowing, and his wonders? They’re on another level! His kingdom is gonna stand forever, no cap. And his power? Been rocking from generation to generation, way back in the day.
So Nebuchadnezzar was just kickin’ it at his crib, livin’ large in his massive palace:
Yo, I had this insane dream that had me shook! The thoughts runnin’ through my mind and the visuals I saw really messed with me.
So I’m like, ‘Yo, I’m gonna round up all the smartest minds in Babylon and have them spill the tea on what my dream means.’
So these magicians, astrologers, Chaldeans, and fortune-tellers roll up, and I spill all the deets of my dream to them. But dang, they couldn’t even give me a clue about what it meant.
So, finally, Daniel rolls in. His OG name was Belteshazzar, but dude was all about his God and totally in tune with some divine vibes. Anyway, I lay it all out for him about my dream, like:
“Yo Belteshazzar, you’re like the top magician, and I know you’re dialed in with the spiritual realm. So spill it – break down the visions in my dream and what they mean.”
So, here’s the deal, peeps: I had this wild dream while I was chilling in bed. I peeped this massive tree smack in the middle of the world, and let me tell ya, it was insanely tall. Like, mind-blowingly tall. Couldn’t even wrap my head around it, you feel?
Yo, that tree was lit! It was mega strong, reaching high into the sky, and you could see its massive size from everywhere!
The leaves were on point, and the fruit? It was overflowing, like, seriously loaded with fruit! And it wasn’t just for one person; there was enough to feed everyone. Wild animals chilled in its shade, and birds nested in its branches. Basically, it hooked up food for all living beings.
So there I am, lounging in bed, lost in my thoughts, when bam! I get this vision. And yo, guess what? An angelic figure, all holy and majestic, straight up came down from the heavenly scene!
He shouts out and says, like, totally cut down that tree, trim its branches, shake off its leaves, and scatter its fruit all over the place! Make sure the animals steer clear and the birds split from its branches, you feel?
But yo, keep the stump of its roots grounded, okay? Wrap it up with iron and bronze, right there in the fresh green grass. Let it soak up the dew from the heavens, man. And let it chill with the animals in the field.
His mindset’s gotta shift from human-like to wild for a while; he’s gonna live like that for seven periods until he’s back on track.
So basically, the watchers and the holy ones are spreading the word that the Most High is in charge of everything in the human realm. He decides who gets to rule and sometimes puts unexpected people in power.
So King Nebuchadnezzar had this epic dream, and he’s like, ‘Yo, Belteshazzar, you gotta decode this for me, ’cause all the brainiacs in my kingdom are clueless. But I know you got this, ’cause you’re blessed with the spirit of the holy gods.’
So Daniel, aka Belteshazzar, was totally shook for like an hour, his mind all messed up. Then the king was like, ‘Yo Belteshazzar, don’t let this dream stress you.’ And Belteshazzar was like, ‘Listen up, king. The dream’s about those who ain’t feeling you, and the meaning’s for your enemies.’
That tree you peeped, it was huge, towering enough to touch the sky, and everyone caught sight of it from all corners of the globe.
This tree was lit, its leaves were fresh, and it was loaded with fruit. Plus, it hooked up food for everyone – even the animals posted up and chilled under it. And yo, birds were straight vibin’ on its branches too.
Yo, king, you’ve leveled up big time! Your power and influence are next level, reaching for the stars and stretching across the whole earth.
So the king peeped this celestial being coming down, telling him to chop down the tree and toss it out. But leave the stump and roots in the ground, wrap ’em up with iron and bronze, and set ’em in a lush field. It’ll get nourished by heaven’s dew, and you’ll be chillin’ with the wild crew until seven periods of time pass.
Here’s the deal, O king. This is what the Almighty says, and it’s for my esteemed ruler:
They’re gonna kick you out of society, and you’ll live with the wild crew. You’ll be munching on grass like a cow, with the dew from heaven keeping you hydrated. It’s gonna last for seven cycles until you realize that the big boss up there runs the show in the human realm, and He gives power to whoever He wants.
And they were all like, ‘Leave that stump with its roots intact, dude!’ So basically, your kingdom will be solid, my man, once you recognize that the heavens are the ultimate rulers, ya feel?
Yo, king, listen up and vibe with me here. Take my advice: clean up your act by doing what’s right, and make up for your wrongs by helping out those in need. Maybe then you’ll find some peace and chill in your life.
King Nebuchadnezzar dealt with all of this.
After a whole year, he strolled around the sick palace in Babylon.
So, like, the king was all, ‘Yo, peep this! Isn’t Babylon epic? Like, I totally built this dope kingdom with all my power and majesty, you know, to flex and show off?’
So, as the king was talking, a voice from heaven suddenly spoke out and was like, ‘Yo, King Nebuchadnezzar, listen up. This is what’s going down: The kingdom is getting taken away from you.’
And they’re gonna kick you out from chillin’ with humans, so you’ll have to hang with the wild crew instead. They’re gonna make you munch on grass like a cow, and you’ll be in this state for seven rounds until you finally get that the ultimate power runs the human kingdom, and He gives it to whoever He wants.
So, like, right at that moment, what the prophet said about Nebuchadnezzar actually went down. He got totally kicked out of society, started munching on grass like a cow, and his body was soaked in heavenly dew until his hair was wild like eagle feathers and his nails grew long like bird claws or something.
Then, after a while, Nebuchadnezzar looked up to the sky and suddenly he was back to his senses. He was like, ‘Yo, praise the Most High!’ He started giving mad props and showing respect to this eternal dude who rules forever and has a kingdom that spans generations.
And everyone on Earth is considered insignificant, but he does whatever he wants in heaven and on Earth, and no one can challenge his decisions.
Then, like, my sanity was restored just like that, you know? And dude, the glory of my kingdom came back to me, along with all the respect and wisdom. My advisors and crew were all coming to me for guidance, man. My reign was solidified, and I felt blessed with this awesome majestic vibe, you get it?
Yo, I gotta give major props to the King of heaven! His game is flawless, everything He does is legit, and He never holds back with His judgments. And let me tell you, anyone who acts all proud, He’s definitely got the power to humble them.

Daniel 5

King Belshazzar threw this epic bash with like a thousand of his VIPs, and they were totally vibing with that wine.
So, Belshazzar was just chilling and sipping his wine, and he was like, ‘Yo, bring me those lit gold and silver items my dad Nebuchadnezzar jacked from the temple in Jerusalem.’ He wanted to flex on the gram with his crew, including his squad, his wifey, and his side peeps, by drinking from those fancy cups and stuff.
So they brought the super fancy stuff they snagged from the temple in Jerusalem, and the king, his squad, his wifey, and his side peeps used them to sip their drinks.
They were chillin’ with their wine, hyping up the gods of bling, flaunting their gold, silver, brass, iron, wood, and stone.
Suddenly, these fingers appeared and started writing on the wall across from the candlestick in the king’s palace. The king saw the hand as it wrote.
The king’s whole vibe totally shifted, and he was legit freaked out, to the point where he couldn’t even stand straight and his knees were, like, knocking together.
The king hollered for the astrologers, Chaldeans, and fortune-tellers. And he was like, “Yo, wise peeps of Babylon, whoever can read this text and break it down for me will rock a dope scarlet outfit, blingin’ with a sick gold chain, and score the third-in-command spot in the kingdom. (FYI, ‘aloud’ in Chaldee means ‘with might’, and ‘scarlet’ can also mean ‘purple’)
So all the king’s brainiacs rolled in, but they couldn’t even crack that scribble or spill the tea to the king about what it meant.
So King Belshazzar was freaking out big time, like you could see the panic all over his face, and his crew was totally shook.
So, the queen showed up at the party because of all the commotion with the king and his crew. And then, the queen spoke up and said, “Hey king, live long and prosper! Don’t let your worries get to you or show on your face.”
Yo, listen up, there’s this guy in your kingdom who’s filled with the spirit of the holy gods. Back in the day, your dad was all about this guy’s insight, understanding, and wisdom – like, even on the level of the gods! Your dad, King Nebuchadnezzar, put this guy in charge of magicians, astrologers, Chaldeans, and all those fortune-teller peeps. And we’re talking about your actual dad here, not just your grandpa or anything, straight up.
So, Daniel was really awesome and had mad skills with a super sharp mind, wisdom, interpreting dreams, explaining complex stuff, and clearing up uncertainties. The king even gave him the cool name Belteshazzar. Now, we gotta bring in Daniel because he’s about to lay down some serious wisdom with his interpretations.
So, Daniel gets summoned before the king, right? And the king’s like, chatting with him, asking, ‘Yo, are you that Daniel dude? The one from the peeps of Judah, like, you know, the ones my dad, or maybe my grandpa, brought outta Jewry?’
I’ve heard about you, bro, that you’re all about that divine energy, with some seriously lit vibes and crazy wisdom. You’re on another level!
So these really wise guys, the astrologers, were called in to decipher this writing and tell me what it means. But hey, they couldn’t crack the code. Bummer.
So, word is that you’re the real deal at decoding things and clearing up confusion. If you can read this writing and break it down for me, I’ll hook you up with some sweet scarlet threads, a sick gold chain for your neck, and you’ll score the title of third-in-command in the kingdom. No kidding, man. Let’s see what you got.
So, Daniel spoke up and was like, ‘Yo, King, you can keep your gifts and rewards. Give them to someone else. But I got you—I’ll read the message and break down its meaning for you, no worries.’
Yo, king! The Almighty God hooked up your pops, Nebuchadnezzar, with a sick kingdom, tons of respect, and major honor. Can you dig it?
And because of how awesome God made him, all the people, nations, and languages were seriously awestruck and terrified of him: he could straight up take out anyone he wanted, spare anyone he wanted, promote whoever he wanted, and demote whoever he wanted.
But when he started getting all full of himself, letting his ego take over, he got knocked off his royal throne and stripped of his glory.
And he got booted from chilling with the in-crowd; his heart went into beast mode, and he started living among the wild donkeys. They fed him grass like they do to cattle, and his body was drenched with dew from the sky, until he recognized that the Almighty God is the one who calls the shots in the kingdom of humans. He decides who’s in charge.
And hey, Belshazzar, dude, you didn’t show an ounce of humility, even though you knew better.
But you’ve been rebellious against the Almighty Lord. You and your crew thought it was cool to flex with the sacred stuff from His place. You and your squad, your partners, your wifey, and your side-chicks all sipped that wine from those holy cups. And on top of that, you even gave props to these useless gods made of silver, gold, brass, iron, wood, and stone, even though they can’t see, hear, or understand a thing. Meanwhile, the true God, who controls your every breath and directs your whole life, you completely ignored and disrespected.
And then He sent a message with a pic of His hand, like a DM. And, like, He totally wrote this powerful message.
So, there was this writing on the wall, saying MENE, MENE, TEKEL, UPHARSIN.
So, like, here’s what this means: MENE. God has weighed your kingdom, and it’s game over.
You’ve been weighed and thoroughly judged, and sorry to say, but you didn’t measure up, fam.
Fam, your kingdom’s divided and handed over to the Medes and Persians.
So Belshazzar was like, ‘Yo, deck Daniel out in some fancy clothes and throw a sick gold chain around his neck.’ Then he made a big announcement declaring that Daniel would be the third-in-command in the kingdom.
That night, Belshazzar, the king of the Chaldeans, got taken down.
And Darius the Median took over as king when he was about sixty-two years old. (Note: ‘Chaldee’ means he was from the Chaldean dynasty)

Daniel 6

Darius was super hyped about appointing 120 top-notch dudes to manage the entire kingdom.
There were three presidents, and Daniel was the top dog. The princes reported to them, so the king wouldn’t have any issues.
This dude Daniel stood out big time from all the other VIPs and important folks because he had this incredible vibe about him. The king was even considering promoting him to rule over the whole kingdom. Pretty impressive, huh?
So, the high-ups and VIPs were totally trying to dig up dirt on Daniel in his role in the kingdom, but they couldn’t find any reason to accuse him. I mean, the guy was totally loyal and flawless; there wasn’t a single mistake or fault in him at all.
Yo, these dudes were like, ‘We can’t trip Daniel up unless we nail him on something about his faith and religious rules.’
So, like, all these presidents and princes gathered up and went straight to the king, like, “Yo King Darius, we wish you a long, happy life!”
Then, all the big shots in the kingdom – the presidents, governors, princes, counselors, and captains – came together to lay down this super official rule. It’s basically a royal decree, you know? They decided that for a whole month, if anyone asks for anything from a god or another person, besides you, O King, they’re getting tossed into the lions’ den. That’s pretty intense, huh?
Yo, king, seal the decree and put your John Hancock on that paper, no changes allowed. This is the law of the Medes and Persians, it’s as solid as a rock.
So, like, King Darius was totally cool with signing off on the whole document and decree.
So, when Daniel heard about this new law, he went back to his place, opened his windows facing Jerusalem, and every day, three times a day, he knelt down, prayed, and gave thanks to his God, just like he always did.
So, like, these guys got together and caught Daniel in the act, you know, praying and making requests to his God.
So they went up to the king and brought up the decree. “Hey, didn’t you sign off on a law that says anyone who asks for anything from any god or person for the next thirty days, except you, king, gets tossed into the lion’s den?” The king confirmed, “Yep, that’s right, as per the unchangeable law of the Medes and Persians.”
And they were like, ‘Hey, King! Daniel, he’s from Judah and he ain’t even trippin’ about your rules or the decree you signed. He’s out here praying three times a day, no matter what.’
When the king heard this, he was super upset with himself and tried everything he could to save Daniel. He hustled all day long, brainstorming how to rescue him until the sun went down.
So, these guys gathered around the king and were like, ‘Hey, listen up, King, here’s the deal – in Medes and Persians land, once the king makes a decree or sets up a law, it’s like, set in stone and can’t be messed with, you know?
So the king was like, ‘Hey, bring Daniel here and throw him in the lion’s den.’ And then the king said to Daniel, ‘Listen, Daniel, your God whom you’re always loyal to, He will surely save you.’
So, they brought this huge stone and sealed the mouth of the den with it. To make sure there were no changes, the king sealed it tight with his own signet ring and those of his crew. There was no way they were going to change their minds about what to do with Daniel!
Then the king went back home, pulling an all-nighter with no tunes playing, and he couldn’t even catch some shut-eye.
So the king woke up real early the next morning and rushed over to the lions’ den.
When he reached the den, he called out to Daniel in a really sad voice: “Daniel, my man! The king asked Daniel, ‘Hey, Daniel, you’ve been faithful to the one true God, right? Can He rescue you from these lions?’
King, live forever!
My God sent His angel and shut the lions’ mouths! They didn’t even scratch me because, you know, I’m innocent before Him. And don’t worry, King, I haven’t harmed you either!
The king was pumped and ordered them to rescue Daniel from the den. They pulled Daniel out, and he wasn’t harmed at all because he had serious faith in his God.
So the king was like, ‘Yo, take those guys who accused Daniel and toss them into the lion’s den with their families.’ And let me tell you, those lions wrecked them – broke all their bones before they even hit the floor of the den.
Yo, King Darius sent out a message to all corners of the world – to people of every race, nation, and language. He just wanted to spread love and say, may peace be multiplied to all of you.
Listen up, everyone! Here’s the big news: Throughout my kingdom, I’m making it known that everyone better honor and revere the God of Daniel. He’s totally legit, alive forever, and his kingdom is rock solid. He’s gonna be in charge forever and ever.
He’s like, next level amazing, you know? He swoops in, pulls off insane miracles everywhere, in the heavens and right here on Earth. And check it out, he totally came through and rescued Daniel from those lion guys! Like, major boss move.
Daniel totally flourished under Darius and even when Cyrus the Persian took over. The guy was absolutely thriving!

Daniel 7

Yo, check it—back in King Belshazzar’s Babylonian crib, Daniel had this insane dream, right? He’s just chilling on his bed, when bam! He starts seeing these crazy visions in his head. It was so intense he had to jot it all down and spill the deets of what went down. And let me tell ya, it was some seriously important stuff, you dig?
So, like, Daniel’s all, “Yo, listen up! I had this epic vision smack dab in the middle of the night, and guess what? I peeped these four wild winds of the sky going all out on this massive sea.”
So, check it—there were these four epic beasts that straight up popped outta the sea, and each one was totally unique, you feel me? Like, they had their own thing going on!
The first one was fierce, like a lion, rockin’ these sick eagle wings and all. But then, yo, I saw those wings get plucked clean off, and it got lifted up from the ground and stood on two feet like a human, with its own mind and all. Seriously, it got a whole new vibe, dude.
Yo, peep this other beast—it’s like a bear, but with a twist. It’s all flexin’ on one side, and it’s got three ribs chillin’ between its teeth, you know? Then they straight up told it, “Yo, go out and chow down on some serious flesh.”
Then I saw this insane thing—it was like a leopard, but with four wings on its back, like a bird. And check this out, it had four heads too! This beast was all about ruling, like it was handed some serious power.
Yo, check it, I had this vision one night, and there was this crazy beast, like next-level intense. It was super strong with these massive iron teeth, straight-up smashing and stomping everything in its path. And yo, it was unlike any beast I’d seen—totally one-of-a-kind. Oh, and it had ten horns, just so you know.
Then I peeped these horns, right? And guess what? Outta nowhere, another small horn pops up, straight up roots three of the original horns! But wait, there’s more—this new horn had eyes like a human’s and a mouth spitting some seriously wise talk!
So, I was peeping this scene where the thrones were set up, and the Ancient of Days came through, decked out in a fresh white fit and hair on point like wool. His throne was blazing fire, with wheels on fire too.
Then this lit stream of fire starts flowing, and there were like a ton of angels serving him, with a mega crew standing in front of him. And then, it was time for the ultimate judgment, and yo, the books were cracked wide open, spilling all the details.
Yo, I was vibing to this powerful horn dropping some major truth bombs. And I kept watching until the beast got totally wiped out, his body wrecked and tossed into the blazing flames.
Like, the other animals lost their power, but they still got a little more time on the clock. It’s like they got an extension, you feel me? They got some extra time to roam around and do their thing. (In Aramaic, it was like they were given this extra time to live)
Yo, I had this dream at night and it blew my mind! There was this dude, looking totally rad, kinda like the Son of Man, descending from the sky on epic clouds. Then he approached the Ancient of Days, and they totally brought him up close.
And he was given mad power, fame, and a whole kingdom, so that people from every nation and language would be like, honoring him, you know? His power is gonna be everlasting, never gonna fade, and his kingdom will be mega solid, like it’ll never ever crumble.
So, like, I, Daniel, was feeling super shook and uneasy. It’s like my head was filled with these intense visions that were totally freaking me out.
I approached someone there and straight up asked them to break it down for me. They filled me in and explained the whole deal.
Yo, listen up! These massive beasts, all four of ’em, they stand for four kings who are gonna rise up from the earth.
But the righteous and epic people of the Most High will totally seize the kingdom and possess it forever and ever, like, for all eternity and beyond.
So, I was really digging to uncover the whole deal about the fourth beast. It was totally next-level compared to the others, like super intense. It had these insane iron teeth and bronze claws. It would, like, devour everything, smash stuff to bits, and then stomp all over what was left. The Chaldean folks said it was unlike anything else.
There were ten horns on its head, and then another horn sprouted up, making three fall before it. This new horn had eyes and a mouth that talked big. It was way more confident than the others around it.
Yo, I peeped this wild horn straight up beefing with the saints and actually winning; like, it conquered and all, no cap.
But then the OG showed up, and the squad got their rightful judgment; finally, it was time for them to rule the kingdom.
So, he was like, ‘Yo, the fourth beast is gonna be a whole new deal on earth, totally unlike anything before. It’s gonna straight up devour the entire earth, stomp all over it, and smash it to bits.’
There will be these ten horns from that kingdom, right? They’re like ten kings who will rise up. And then this other guy is gonna pop up after them. He’s gonna be completely different from the first guy and will take down three kings.
And he’s gonna straight up disrespect the Most High, causing major trouble for the saints. He’ll even try to change up the rules and laws, but don’t stress—it’s only gonna last for a little while. He might have some power, but it’s not gonna stick around forever, just for a bit.
But yo, there’s gonna be this ultimate showdown, where they’ll take away his power and completely destroy him, all the way to the finish line, you feel me?
And yo, the kingdom, power, and greatness of that kingdom all across the entire world will be given to the people who are super blessed and stay loyal to the Most High. Their kingdom is gonna be everlasting, and all the rulers and leaders will totally serve and obey them.
That’s pretty much a wrap, the end of the story. So, for real, guys, I gotta be honest, I was totally shook and it was written all over my face. But I, Daniel, kept my thoughts and feelings to myself, just processing it all quietly.

Daniel 8

In the third year that King Belshazzar ruled, I, Daniel, had a vision. It came after the first one I had.
So, check it, I had this super cool vision, right? It was totally epic because I found myself in Shushan, you know, that fancy palace in the province of Elam. And in this vision, I was just chilling by the Ulai River, soaking it all in.
So, like, I glanced up and saw this totally rad ram with two massive horns, chilling by the river. And yo, the horns were pretty huge, but one was even bigger than the other, and it grew last.
I saw the ram flexing in every direction—west, north, south—and no other animals could handle him; literally, no one could stop him. He did whatever he wanted and straight up became a legend.
So, as I was pondering this, yo, this super cool goat comes rolling in from the west, like, gliding over the whole earth without even touching the ground. And check it, this goat has this epic horn right between its eyes—totally eye-catching, you know what I’m saying?
And he straight up charged at the ram with two epic horns, which I had seen chilling by the river, hitting him with all his powerful vibes.
So, like, I saw this intense showdown between the dude and the ram. He got really ticked off and went at the ram, breaking its two horns. The ram couldn’t do a thing against him and got knocked to the ground. And to cap it all off, he straight up stomped on the ram. Nobody could rescue the ram from his grip.
Then the he-goat got all powerful and when he was at his peak, the big horn got shattered; and then four impressive ones popped up, each heading in a different direction, like the four winds in the sky.
Yo, one of those beasts grew a little horn that blew up big time, heading toward the south, east, and some stunning spot.
And it got crazy powerful, like bossing around the heavenly crew; it even brought down some of the squad members and stars to the ground and totally crushed them.
Yeah, this dude thought he was top dog, dissing the boss of the crew. He messed with the daily grind, stopped the sacrifices, and messed up the holy place—all because of his ego trip.
And like, this whole army got sent because of, you know, all the wrongs going down, and it totally trashed the truth and just did its own thing, and, like, totally succeeded.
So, I’m listening to this saint dude, and then another saint dude was like, yo, how much longer is this vision gonna go on about the daily sacrifices and the messed-up stuff going down in the sanctuary? Like, when will the holy place and the people get trampled on?
And he told me, it’s gonna take two thousand and three hundred days for the sanctuary to be all good and clean. You know, like, just righteous and justified, y’know?
So, I’m Daniel, right? And I’m deep into this epic vision, trying to figure out what it all means. And bam! Out of nowhere, this dude appears in front of me, looking totally human and all.
I’m just chilling by the Ulai river when suddenly I hear this dude’s voice saying, ‘Yo, Gabriel! Help this guy understand the vision, man.’
Bro, he comes up to me and I’m totally shook, falling flat on my face. But then he’s like, ‘Listen up, man! Check it out, this vision is gonna happen as everything’s winding down!’
So, while he was talking to me, I was totally knocked out asleep with my face on the ground. But then he tapped me and helped me stand up.
And he was like, yo, listen up – I’m about to drop some knowledge on you about what’s gonna go down in the end times of all that anger stuff. It’s gonna happen right on schedule, no doubt.
So, that ram you saw with those two cool horns? Well, those horns actually represent the kings of Media and Persia, you know?
The wild and rebellious goat, dude, he’s like the top dog ruler of Greece, you know? And that gnarly horn he’s got smack in the middle of his forehead? It represents the original king, the one who started it all, ya know?
And after it gets shattered, four others will pop up in its place, symbolizing four kingdoms that will come from the same nation, but with less power.
And later on in their reign, when the rebellious ones are at their peak, a king with a strong presence, skilled in decoding mysterious messages, will rise up.
And his strength will be absolutely next-level, like, way beyond what he’s got on his own, you know? He’s gonna shake things up in a mind-blowing way, and he’ll totally succeed and do his thing, you feel me? He’s gonna take down all those super powerful people and even mess with the holy ones, like whoa!
And by his cleverness, he’ll make his schemes work; he’ll boost his ego and use diplomacy to bring about destruction for many. He’ll even dare to challenge the Prince of princes, but in the end, he’ll be taken down without any physical force.
Yo, that evening and morning vision? It’s straight up legit, fam. So, like, keep it on the DL for now ’cause it’s gonna take a minute to go down, you feel?
So, yo, I’m Daniel, right? I straight up passed out and was sick for days. But then I bounced back and got back to hustlin’ for the king. Let me tell you, that vision blew my mind, but no one else could figure it out, man.

Daniel 9

Back in the day when Darius, Ahasuerus’ kid, was on the throne ruling the Chaldeans, you know…
So, like, in the first year he was king, I, Daniel, was reading some books and stuff, and I totally figured out that the LORD had told Jeremiah the prophet that, you know, Jerusalem was gonna be wrecked for like seventy years or something.
So I hit up the Lord God, seeking Him through prayer, asking for His help, and fasting, wearing sackcloth and covering myself with ashes:
So, I hit up the big G upstairs, my God, and I totally poured my heart out. I was like, “Lord, you’re seriously awesome and terrifying, and you always come through with your promises and show mad love to those who are all about you and stay true to your rules.”
Man, we really messed up big time—like, seriously shady stuff, straight up wicked and rebellious. We totally went against your rules and judgments:
And we totally brushed off what your prophets were saying—they were speaking on your behalf to our kings, princes, parents, and everyone else in the whole country.
Yo God, you’re all about what’s right, but we’re all messed up and feeling ashamed, just like today. This goes for the folks in Judah, Jerusalem, and all across Israel, whether they’re near or far in all the places you sent them because they messed up and turned away from you.
Yo, God, we seriously messed up. Our leaders, our fam, everyone’s feeling ashamed and embarrassed because we’ve straight-up sinned against you.
God’s got mad love and forgiveness for us, even though we’ve straight up rebelled against him;
We’ve totally blown it with the LORD our God, ignoring the rules he gave us through his prophets.
Yeah, so like, everyone in Israel straight up broke your law by totally going against your commands. And because of that, we’re all cursed and stuff, you know? It’s all written in the law of Moses, God’s faithful servant, because we messed up and sinned against him.
And like, God followed through on everything he said he would do, you know? He’s called out our judges and us for our wrongs, and now we’re dealing with some seriously heavy consequences. Like, no joke, what’s happening to Jerusalem right now hasn’t been seen anywhere else in the world—it’s intense.
According to the law of Moses, all this bad stuff went down on us, but we didn’t even bother praying to the LORD our God, asking for forgiveness and trying to understand your truth.
So, the LORD was kinda watching as all the bad stuff unfolded, letting it happen to us because our God always does what’s right. We messed up big time by ignoring His voice, though.
Almighty God, who totally rescued your crew from Egypt in a legendary way and made a name for yourself, right now we’re seriously sorry. We messed up big time and did some seriously messed up stuff.
Yo, God, I’m praying to you, asking that you cool it and let go of your anger and rage towards Jerusalem, your holy place. The city and its people have become a total shame because of our sins and the messed-up things our ancestors did. Everybody’s dissing us, and it’s not cool.
Yo, God! Please listen to the prayer of your loyal servant and hear their pleas. Let your light shine on your sanctuary that’s all messed up, all for the sake of the Lord.
Yo God, listen up and pay attention. Open your eyes and peep the messed up stuff going down in our city, known by your name. We’re not asking for help ’cause we’re all that, but ’cause we know you’re hella merciful.
Yo, God, listen up; Yo, God, forgive; Yo, God, pay attention and make moves; don’t delay, for your own sake, my dude: ’cause your city and your people are repping your name.
So, I was deep into talking and praying, you know? I was owning up to my own mistakes and those of the people of Israel, and I was laying it all out to the LORD my God, asking for some serious blessings on His sacred pad up on the holy mountain. It was a whole vibe.
And while I was in that prayer zone, out of the blue, Gabriel, the angel dude I’d seen in a vision before, like, zoomed in super fast and caught up with me around sunset. Gotta hand it to him, he looked pretty wiped from all that flying!
And he reached out to me, and we talked, and he was like, ‘Yo, Daniel, I’m here to bless you with serious skills and knowledge. Like, I’m gonna make you really wise, you know.’
When you first started praying, the command was issued, and I’m here to clarify it to you because you’re really valued. So, focus and reflect on what you’ve witnessed.
So, listen up! Here’s what’s going down: Seventy weeks have been set aside for your peeps and the holy city. It’s time to put an end to all the wrongs, make things right, and bring in everlasting righteousness. Oh, and don’t forget about sealing up the visions and prophecies, and anointing the most sacred place. #Blessed
So here’s the deal, you gotta know and understand that from the moment the command goes out to restore and rebuild Jerusalem until the arrival of the Messiah (aka the ultimate boss), there will be a total of seven weeks plus sixty-two weeks. During that time, the streets will be rebuilt and the walls restored, even through tough times. Trust me, it’s gonna happen.
And after sixty-two weeks, the Messiah will be completely cut off, but not for himself, you know? The people of a coming prince will totally trash the city and the holy place, like a flood overwhelming everything. There will be continuous devastation until the end of the war. Seriously, it’s gonna be a real disaster, you feel?
And he will make a firm covenant with many for seven years. But halfway through, he will stop the sacrifices and offerings. He will bring evil and chaos until the final judgment arrives. What has been decreed will be fulfilled, bringing destruction to all.

Daniel 10

Yo, in the third year of Cyrus, king of Persia, Daniel (aka Belteshazzar) got hit with this mind-blowing vision. It was straight-up legit, but it wasn’t gonna happen overnight, you feel me? Daniel, though, he was sharp enough to understand the whole thing, no joke.
So during that time, I, Daniel, was majorly bummed out for a full three weeks. Like, not your average weeks—weeks with days and everything. You catch my drift?
I didn’t indulge in fancy food—no meat or wine for me—and I didn’t even spritz on any nice fragrances for three whole weeks.
So, it was April 24th, and I was posted up by this massive river called Hiddekel.
Then I looked up and saw this super cool dude dressed in designer linen with a dope gold belt. His bling was straight-up gold from Uphaz, you dig?
Yo, this dude’s whole aura was like beryl—his face was lit up like lightning, eyes blazing like fire, and his arms and feet gleamed like polished brass. And when he talked, it was like a whole crowd speaking at once, no lie.
So, it was just me, Daniel, who peeped this epic vision. None of the other homies with me peeped it, but it was so wild that they got seriously shook and bounced to find some hiding spots.
So, I was totally on my own, and then this crazy vision hit me. But honestly, I couldn’t handle it ’cause I was so wiped out. I went from feeling strong and confident to feeling totally drained and, like, just gross and weak all over. (BTW, when I say ‘comeliness,’ I mean my whole vibe and energy, you know? Just to clarify.)
But then I totally heard what he was saying, and when I heard his words, I was, like, knocked into this super intense nap, just face-planted on the ground.
Yo, listen up, this wild thing went down: out of nowhere, someone’s hand grabbed me and made me get on my knees and hands. It was like they moved me or something, you feel me?
Yo, Daniel, my man, pay attention! Get what I’m about to say and stand strong, ’cause I got your back. When he said that to me, I was seriously shaken.
And he was like, “Chill, Daniel! Ever since you tried to understand and stayed humble before God, He heard every word you said, and that’s why I’m here.”
So, there was this Persian prince who gave me a run for my money for a solid 21 days. But you know what? Michael, one of the top angels, came through to help out, and I hung tough with the Persian kings. #TeamMichael
Yo, I’m here to clue you in on what’s about to go down with your crew in the future. This vision’s gonna be important for a while, so listen up.
And when he said that to me, I looked down and couldn’t utter a single word.
So, this guy who looked totally human just popped up and touched my lips. And then I was like, cool, so I opened my mouth and started talking to the guy standing in front of me. I was like, “Hey man, this vision has seriously messed me up and now I’m feeling super weak.”
Like, how can I, just a servant, even chat with my lord, you know? I mean, I was instantly drained and couldn’t even catch my breath. Zero strength left in me, dude.
And then this person came up to me, looking like a regular guy, and gave me a boost of confidence.
And he was like, “Hey dude, I really dig you, so don’t trip out. It’s all good. Be bold, like super bold.” After he said that, I felt so pumped and was like, “Alright, go ahead and speak, my lord. You’ve given me mad strength!”
Yo, listen up. You know why I’m here? I’m about to dip and go duke it out with the prince of Persia. But guess what? Once I’m done, guess who’s next in line? Yeah, the prince of Greece is coming in hot.
But let me give you the scoop straight from the holy script: no one’s got my back in this except Michael, your main dude. He’s holding it down for me, no question.

Daniel 11

Yo, back in the day when Darius the Mede was starting out, I was there to back him up and lift him up, you feel me?
Here’s the scoop: Three kings are gonna rule Persia, but then this fourth dude? He’s gonna be ballin’ out of control, richer than all of ’em combined. And with all that clout, he’s gonna stir up some major drama for Greece.
Then this absolute king is gonna show up, flexing his power and doing things his own way like a total boss.
And when he finally rises up, his kingdom will fall apart, splitting in every direction; it won’t go to his kids, and his reign won’t go on. His kingdom will get uprooted, given to others, not his own.
The king of the south will be a total boss, and one of his top dudes will be too; he’ll be even stronger than everyone else and totally run the show – like, he’s gonna have a massive kingdom and no one can touch him!
After many years, they’ll team up; the daughter of the southern king will go to the northern king to make a deal. But her influence won’t last, neither will he or his power. Instead, she’ll get betrayed, along with those who had her back during that time.
But from her family line, a brave leader will step up, ready to rally their crew and take on the kingdom of the north. They’ll face their enemies head-on and come out on top in the end.
They’ll even snatch up their gods, their leaders, and all their fancy silver and gold loot, dragging them as captives into Egypt. This will go on longer than the reign of the northern king.
So, the king of the south is gonna show off in his kingdom and then peace out back to his own turf.
But his sons will get all pumped up and muster a huge army: one of them will totally show up and dominate, breaking through enemy lines. Then they’ll head back, hyped up, to their fortress.
The king of the south will totally lose it and go all in against the king of the north. He’ll gather this massive army, but in the end, the king of the north will completely crush them.
And after he’s taken out all those opponents, he’ll get all cocky and throw down tens of thousands, but it won’t make him any stronger.
Check it, the king of the north’s gonna come back strong, with an even bigger crew than before. It’s gonna go down after some time with a massive army and tons of wealth. It’s like end of days stuff, you know, even years later.
In those days, there will be many who oppose the southern ruler. Troublemakers among your own people will also try to seize power and do their own thing, but they’ll ultimately fail.
So, the king from the north is gonna roll in, build up a solid fortress, and capture the strongest cities. The peeps from the south won’t stand a chance, even his elite crew won’t be able to resist. It’s gonna be a major showdown.
But those who oppose him will do as they please, and no one will be able to stand against them. They will seize control of the beautiful land by their own strength.
He’ll come in strong with his crew, even some righteous folks. Here’s the deal: he’ll try to form an alliance with this classy lady, but she won’t have his back or support him. It’s a shady setup that won’t work out in his favor.
After that, he’ll turn his focus to the coastlands and conquer many of them. But a crafty leader will rise up and put an end to the shame caused by the first one. He’ll skillfully turn the tables on him without bringing shame upon himself.
And he’ll be showing off on his own turf, but, whoops, he’ll stumble and fall flat. He won’t be able to bounce back from that. It’s a major setback, dude.
Next up, there’s gonna be someone all about that taxation, shining in the kingdom’s glory. But guess what? They won’t last long before they get taken out, and not in a fit of rage or a battle. It’s gonna happen quick and outta nowhere, you feel?
And this person, not exactly beloved by others, will rise to power. They won’t get the royal treatment, but they’ll come in quietly and win over the kingdom with slick talk.
They’ll be swept away like a huge wave and defeated, even the leader who made promises.
And when they make a deal with him, he’s gonna be all sneaky about it: ’cause he’ll rise up and gain power with just a small crew.
He’ll smoothly take over even the richest regions; he’ll pull off feats no one in his family ever did. He’ll spread wealth, loot, and riches among his peeps. Plus, he’ll scheme against strongholds for a while.
And he’s gonna show off his power and bravery to the king of the south, coming in with a huge army. The king of the south will get all worked up and bring his own massive and powerful army to the battle. But he won’t stand a chance, ’cause they’ll plot and scheme against him.
Like, those who used to eat his food will totally betray him, and his crew will be totally outnumbered; many of them will tragically perish.
And these two kings will be up to shady stuff, like for real! They’ll sit at the same table, spinning all kinds of lies. But here’s the deal: their evil schemes won’t succeed, ’cause eventually, it’s all gonna come crashing down at just the right time. (BTW, “hearts” means their intentions, just so you know)
Later on, he’ll head back to his own turf with a ton of cash, totally breaking the sacred agreement. He’ll make some bold moves and bounce back to his hood.
When the time’s right, he’ll come back and head south, but it won’t go down like it did before or after.
Yo, these ships from Cyprus gonna come against him and it’s gonna mess him up big time. You know what’s wild? He’s gonna get all worked up and break his promise to God. And check this out, he’s gonna team up with those who ditched the holy covenant too. Can you believe it?
Some people will side with him and totally desecrate the sacred place. They’ll put a stop to the regular routines there and introduce something messed up that just ruins everything. (Or, like, blows everyone’s minds in a bad way.)
The wicked ones who break their promises will be swayed and fooled by smooth talk, but those who stay true to their God will find inner strength and do amazing things.
The wise ones in the crew will teach many, but they’ll also face defeat in battles, intense trials, imprisonment, and loss for a long time.
So, if they slip up, they’ll find some support, but then a bunch of people will start kissing up to them.
And some of the wise ones will trip up, to see if they’re staying true and to purify them, making them shine bright forever, just like it’s meant to be.
So, the king’s gonna do his own thing, totally boosting his ego, acting like he’s better than any other god out there. He’ll even spout some wild stuff against the one true God. And for a while, he’ll actually succeed, but eventually, his pride will trip him up. You see, everything that’s supposed to happen will happen, exactly as planned.
He won’t give a second thought to the God of his ancestors or show any interest in women, and he won’t have any regard for any gods. All he’ll care about is making himself look better than everyone else.
Instead, he’ll glorify a powerful God, honoring a deity his ancestors never knew, offering up gold, silver, precious gems, and all things desirable as tribute.
Then he’ll do the same in strongholds for a different god, elevating them and giving them power. He’ll make them rule over many and divide up land to profit from it.
As things wrap up, the southern king will challenge the northern king head-on. The northern king will hit back like a whirlwind, with chariots, cavalry, and a huge fleet of ships. He’ll invade lands, conquer territories, and spread far and wide.
He’s gonna take over this amazing spot, and a bunch of other places are gonna get messed up, but certain spots like Edom, Moab, and the big shots from Ammon will manage to stay clear of his grip. (By the way, when it says ‘glorious land,’ it’s like talking about a really cool, fancy, and beautiful place.)
He’s gonna flex on all the countries, and Egypt won’t be able to slip away. #NoEscape
But he’s gonna totally control all the gold, silver, and super valuable stuff in Egypt. Even the Libyans and Ethiopians will be on his side.
But news from the east and the north will freak him out, so he’ll get super angry and go all out to destroy and take out a lot of people.
And he’s gonna set up his epic pad on a mountain that’s like, super sacred and impressive, surrounded by two big seas. But in the end, he’s gonna meet his downfall, and no one’s gonna be able to save him. (goodly…: or, super rad, etc.: Heb. mountain of ultimate awesomeness)

Daniel 12

Yo, when that time hits, Michael, the OG prince who’s got our back, gonna step up. It’s gonna be straight-up wild, like never seen before, from the jump of nations ’til now. But chill, ’cause when that moment hits, all our squad who’s on point gonna be saved and delivered, no doubt.
A bunch of those sleeping in the dirt gonna wake up, dude. Some gonna live their best life, while others gonna feel major shame and regret forever, man.
And those who are wise gonna shine like the coolest stars in the sky; and those who inspire others to do good gonna shine like forever-famous stars.
But yo, Daniel, keep these words on the down low and lock up the scroll until the end times: mad people gonna be traveling everywhere, and knowledge gonna be lit.
So I, Daniel, peeped the scene and saw two other beings, one on each side of the riverbank. They were just chilling there, soaking it all in. Oh, and BTW, ‘bank’ in Hebrew means ‘lip’. We talking about riverbanks here, not cash money. Just so you know. ✌️
And someone asked the dude in the fresh linen fit, who was hovering over the river, like, how long till all these dope things wrap up? You know, from up above and all.
And I heard the guy in the fancy fit, standing on the river, lifting both his hands up to the sky, making a big promise. He swore by the One who lives forever that something major is gonna go down for a set time. Once the power of the holy people gets wrecked, everything will be wrapped up.
I was listening, but I didn’t get it, so I asked, “Yo, my Lord, what’s gonna go down at the end?”
And he was like, “Yo, Daniel, just chill for now. These words are locked up and sealed tight until the end times, you feel me?”
Like, a bunch of people are gonna level up and go through some serious trials, while the wicked ones will just keep being wicked. And, like, none of those wicked peeps will get it, but the wise ones, yo, they’ll totally understand what’s up.
And when they stop the daily sacrifices and set up something super detestable that causes chaos, there will be 1,290 days until it’s all over and things go back to normal. That detestable thing is gonna shock everyone.
Blessed is the one who stays patient and makes it to the 1,335-day mark.
Keep doing your thing until it’s all over. In the end, you’ll get your well-deserved rest and receive what’s coming to you.